THE LIST
30 BEFORE 25Friends
AyaKayla
Hil
Irish
Jilley
Jonas
Jouise
Jouisethree
Krizia
Melvin and Flo
Q
Rai
Wesley
Fashion Blogs
CamilleKryz
Laureen
Rumi
Saab
Tricia
Inspirational
SammyThings we forget
E Purity
Journalling through photos
Friday, April 27, 2012
How Uncool is That?
One of the negative eye-opening things I experienced growing up was realizing I'm not cool.
No, seriously. I have always considered myself uncool. There was this time back in high school when my classmate from grade school told my high school friends, "Sam's friend were nerds back in grade school." I was like totally shocked at this revelation/backstabbing. Really, they were nerds? So that makes me a nerd too?
We're not the studious type of nerd, no. Asa naman. I think it was because we were a weird group. My friends were foreigners, and our lunch table was like the United Nations every single day. Pei was Taiwanese, Da Sol was Korean, and me, a Filipina. We spoke in broken English so that we could understand each other. We wrote too many letters even though we see each other everyday. And made up all those weird notebooks and group names (say hello go S.H.E. and G.A.L.S!) Never in my life did it cross my mind that we were not cool. Or maybe, never in my life did I consider it mattered.
I was uncool as a high school student. I realized this when I transferred to Rizal, where my high school was status quo conscious and I never could have fit in. My first friend in third year high was... well... considered the most uncool girl of the batch, needless to say, because she was weird and allegedly a thief. I remember my friend from grade school saying, "Sam, stay away from her while it's not too late." And I was baffled, why?
I continued being uncool until I graduated, always in the shadow of my mother. Although, really, I never was. Haha. It's just that it was how they got to know me. It was always with my mom and I had no choice, so okay bear with it. You would have thought making it to the student council was cool, but it really was just a show. No amount of title could make anyone cool or uncool than they already are.
College was another story. If you say "church" a lot of people will find it weird. Or would likely get a response like, "Yung mga Jesus-jesus tapos kumakanta?" Offensive, but more on hilarious! Haha, yes. I frequented the Sunken Garden playing the sports I sucked at for fellowship activities, practicing songs for the worship services every week, doing Bible studies and sharing the gospel to strangers. A lot of people will find that weird, and until now, I do so too. Who would have thought I'd be doing this? My parents would never believe it. And some people would say, how uncool is that?
But when I look back now, I become thankful I did not lose my friends by considering them uncool. They gave me more loyalty than I have asked, and greater friendship than what I could have received. The standards of grade school, high school and college coolness will inevitably change as we grow up. And I'm glad I did not become short-sighted enough to trade people for my reputation.
We all find reasons to consider ourselves uncool. My current status of being uncool was not graduating with honors. Obviously, I feel so bitter about it and I will probably do so until I get my revenge AKA a comeback that proves that it may not really matter. But I am done proving people wrong. Let them find out for themselves because I'm not wasting my time working on changing their minds.
One of the best quiet times I've had was knowing that God was pleased. I imagined him saying "I'm proud of you" during my graduation even as I say, "Kahit wala akong honors?"
The answer was a 'yes'.
Here's to the uncool people with the best friends and the security about who they are. :)
No, seriously. I have always considered myself uncool. There was this time back in high school when my classmate from grade school told my high school friends, "Sam's friend were nerds back in grade school." I was like totally shocked at this revelation/backstabbing. Really, they were nerds? So that makes me a nerd too?
We're not the studious type of nerd, no. Asa naman. I think it was because we were a weird group. My friends were foreigners, and our lunch table was like the United Nations every single day. Pei was Taiwanese, Da Sol was Korean, and me, a Filipina. We spoke in broken English so that we could understand each other. We wrote too many letters even though we see each other everyday. And made up all those weird notebooks and group names (say hello go S.H.E. and G.A.L.S!) Never in my life did it cross my mind that we were not cool. Or maybe, never in my life did I consider it mattered.
I was uncool as a high school student. I realized this when I transferred to Rizal, where my high school was status quo conscious and I never could have fit in. My first friend in third year high was... well... considered the most uncool girl of the batch, needless to say, because she was weird and allegedly a thief. I remember my friend from grade school saying, "Sam, stay away from her while it's not too late." And I was baffled, why?
I continued being uncool until I graduated, always in the shadow of my mother. Although, really, I never was. Haha. It's just that it was how they got to know me. It was always with my mom and I had no choice, so okay bear with it. You would have thought making it to the student council was cool, but it really was just a show. No amount of title could make anyone cool or uncool than they already are.
College was another story. If you say "church" a lot of people will find it weird. Or would likely get a response like, "Yung mga Jesus-jesus tapos kumakanta?" Offensive, but more on hilarious! Haha, yes. I frequented the Sunken Garden playing the sports I sucked at for fellowship activities, practicing songs for the worship services every week, doing Bible studies and sharing the gospel to strangers. A lot of people will find that weird, and until now, I do so too. Who would have thought I'd be doing this? My parents would never believe it. And some people would say, how uncool is that?
But when I look back now, I become thankful I did not lose my friends by considering them uncool. They gave me more loyalty than I have asked, and greater friendship than what I could have received. The standards of grade school, high school and college coolness will inevitably change as we grow up. And I'm glad I did not become short-sighted enough to trade people for my reputation.
We all find reasons to consider ourselves uncool. My current status of being uncool was not graduating with honors. Obviously, I feel so bitter about it and I will probably do so until I get my revenge AKA a comeback that proves that it may not really matter. But I am done proving people wrong. Let them find out for themselves because I'm not wasting my time working on changing their minds.
One of the best quiet times I've had was knowing that God was pleased. I imagined him saying "I'm proud of you" during my graduation even as I say, "Kahit wala akong honors?"
The answer was a 'yes'.
Here's to the uncool people with the best friends and the security about who they are. :)
Thursday, April 26, 2012
The Avengers
Yesterday, Ate Toni, Ate Danes, Kuya Jouise, Nikki and I watched the Avengers
Premier, and 3D! :>
I haven't been a fan of the Avengers. I don't even know who they are,
since I am more familiar with the Justice League.
I didn't know The Hulk, Ironman, Captain America and Thor belong to a team!
My favorite Avenger?
THOR. :>
Or maybe, just Chris Hemsworth.
Then, at the same place after the movie (the art of coordinating your outings haha),
I met with Russel and JC for dinner at Flavors of China
I just realized that we are graduates already!
Thus the talks on employment and other plans.
Even though we were just three, it took us all night
that I actually had to run to catch the last trip!
that I actually had to run to catch the last trip!
Talk about the stress of living long distance.
But still
Totally worth it. :)
Monday, April 23, 2012
Graduation Day
I looked like a debutante on my graduation.
And that's exactly how I liked it to be!!
I'm a sucker for romantic, wedding looks and my outfit was really last minute.
How last minute?
Let's just say Mom and I dropped off the mall about 10 minute before it closed.
We chose two dresses. The first one, I wasn't as pleased but it was okay.
But despite the rush, I insisted on trying the second one even though it didn't look good on the hanger.
Turns out it was gorgeous!
I bought my shoes the night before my graduation.
Mom lent me her golden pouch and pearl necklace
worn with the signature "sablay" from UP.
I'm glad that in my last three graduations, I always wear a white dress instead of a toga!
If you would remember correctly, I worked hard for UP so that I would not wear uniform. Haha.
Ultimate treat! :)
Mom and I did my make-up on both college and university graduations.
It was frustrating at first because we both knew nothing about hair styling.
But well the curls looked decent to me, despite the wild tips.
On my second graduation, I decided to simplify and wore this origami earrings.
I know it's casual, but what the hell, I bought it the day I received my diploma
and it signifies freedom! Three years of victory: elementary, high school and college!!
'Kay, I just made that up.
Thank you to these people! And the people who wished me well!!
CONGRATULATIONS BATCH 2012!! :)
And to all those who did not graduate for four years, never ever feel bad.
Sometimes I feel jealous because they are all going to have a party next year. Haha.
And sometimes, well okay I admit, I feel bitter about not having honors HAHA
Di makaget-over.
Danggg.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Let me finish
Friday, April 20, 2012
Thank you, Dad
Dad: Ilan sa mga batchmates mo ang ggraduate?
Me: Actually konti lang Dad.
Dad: Sabi nga ng kliyente ko, 4 and a half years daw talaga ang college sa UP kasi hinihiwalay yung thesis.
Me: Onga eh, mahirap ang 18 units with thesis.
Dad: Pero nakaya mo diba? It's all in the mind.
Me: But 'di ako laude.
Dad: Okay lang yan.
Me: Halos lahat sa college namin cum laude. Exception talaga pag di ka cum laude.
Dad: Ah okay lang yan. Magiging successful ka naman.
Me: Right.
Dad: You remind me of your lolo when you wear that ring.
"Happy happy birthday to my one and only daughter. Just wanna tell you that I'm so proud and privileged to have a caring, loving and achieving sibling like you. God in his goodness and grace has gifted me with a daughter whom I love so much. May all your dreams and wishes come true as you enter another phase in your life as you graduate. Me and your mom will always be here for you. When your mom was pregnant, I asked God to give me daughter. Never thought he will give me a wonderful gift of person like you. Couldn't ask for more. I love you anak and I will always be here for you."
That look on his face when we commuted for the first time together. He parked his car somewhere in Baclaran saying that the traffic make it impossible for him to get to his destination on time. We rode the LRT. He looked so worried and actually asked me to go to the female area, and I'm like, "Dad, I commute everyday". Then he'd ask me to go to the spot with less people and glance over his shoulder to see if there are bad guys. The way he prods me to eat breakfast even though my college life has an underlying theme of skipped breakfasts. How he drives the long way to take me off my destination and lets me hang out in the office even though I'm just there for the Wifi.
It's weird. I haven't gotten used to having Dad around so much. And I feel so thankful God gave me an opportunity to spend more time. :)
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Sent Off
It sucks not to be cum laude. Haha. Not that most of my blockmates are. Sometimes I'm tempted to think that I could have been cum laude. There is a tendency to say "Hey I'm even smarter than him/her" but that's plain unfair. Cum laude standing does not necessarily measure intellect but diligence. And I can't claim that in college I have been so. Oh well, I'll be successful anyway. :))
I have just come from my second HOPE ocular. It was so tiring. I am amazed at Kuya Mark's patience and friendliness. He talks to everyone. Like a mere mortal I tend to ignore street vendors, drunkards, tambays or children, but this guy extends his hand to everyone. It dumbfounded and exhausted me as I realized how much I'm suffering in the non-prejudice department.
Last night the ladies had an overnight, but not after a surprise send-off party for us graduating students. Still not sinking in, though. And tomorrow's graduation. Haha. I love my church. They have been an answered prayer for me, and I just feel like myself around them. I can be silly, corny, serious, proud, inspiring, confused and smart around them. I love themmmmm. They gave us tiaras and sashes since the graduating batch are mostly girls. At first I felt sad because most of my friends are graduating in 2013. My ex co-leaders, my 2008 batchmates who are on five year courses, high school batchmates who are in UP and other delayed transferee batchmates. Initially I felt scared at the thought of facing the real world with few comrades. But this is a blessing, I guess. Whatever I will face, I can teach.
The ladies had a talk before we slept. I love how we can go bare around each other. We can cry, comfort and think through things together. I definitely look forward to go to the Yuppies housechurch since most of them are my friends already. I should really drop the "Ate" and "po/opo" but it's just part of me even though I can sense that we're just peers. Thank you Lord for these ladies. Smart, sweet and brave girls.
I have just come from my second HOPE ocular. It was so tiring. I am amazed at Kuya Mark's patience and friendliness. He talks to everyone. Like a mere mortal I tend to ignore street vendors, drunkards, tambays or children, but this guy extends his hand to everyone. It dumbfounded and exhausted me as I realized how much I'm suffering in the non-prejudice department.
Last night the ladies had an overnight, but not after a surprise send-off party for us graduating students. Still not sinking in, though. And tomorrow's graduation. Haha. I love my church. They have been an answered prayer for me, and I just feel like myself around them. I can be silly, corny, serious, proud, inspiring, confused and smart around them. I love themmmmm. They gave us tiaras and sashes since the graduating batch are mostly girls. At first I felt sad because most of my friends are graduating in 2013. My ex co-leaders, my 2008 batchmates who are on five year courses, high school batchmates who are in UP and other delayed transferee batchmates. Initially I felt scared at the thought of facing the real world with few comrades. But this is a blessing, I guess. Whatever I will face, I can teach.
The ladies had a talk before we slept. I love how we can go bare around each other. We can cry, comfort and think through things together. I definitely look forward to go to the Yuppies housechurch since most of them are my friends already. I should really drop the "Ate" and "po/opo" but it's just part of me even though I can sense that we're just peers. Thank you Lord for these ladies. Smart, sweet and brave girls.
1 Day till Graduation.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Bloomberg
Dad says the bromeliad flower blooms only once in three years
But when it does, it's worth the wait. :)
The little office room being constructed on the side of the house is almost through.
We're making some home improvements considering the new set-up.
The cabinet is already in place, but I need bigger space for other things such as my accessories/bags/shoes.
I wanted a space to hang photos too!
 |
| The cutest cats, Bonnie and Clyde :) |
I've been busy with work-related things (is it okay to want to quit already? Lol)
and clearing the way for graduation.
So I thought I have freed myself from the lines, but now I have to pay
and go through the bureaucracy one last time!
I did a "dress rehearsal" this afternoon.
I looked good with my grad dress, my sablay and a long hair!!
I like looking good in such occasions.
At least it's a far cry from how I looked like back in high school. Haha.
I'm also excited for HOPE!
Blessed by the hearts of the team leaders, that is.
The task is so difficult and challenging that it is bound to have
a very awesome "God story".
Lord we pray for five days of changed lives!
Sunday, April 15, 2012
I survived the Outbreak
Well at least I have crossed out one of my 30 before 25 checklist! Run a 5K! What a better way to run a 5K than to be chased by zombies on an uneven terrain under the heat of the sun with friends! My body's aching because of OUTBREAK MANILA!
The day before that was our Frisbee Friday, so we basically wasted the afternoon tossing discs and eating pizza at the Sunken Garden. Oh wow, I'll surely miss my school days. Then we went to Trinoma to eat dinner before heading out to meet Ate Cheng at the MRT. We did some funny experiment. Erris, Dee and Ryuh were seating across me, Ate Danes and Tiann and we were giving trivias about things we learned at school (benefit of intelligent/multi-disciplinary friends haha). We tested if people will go between us as we were speaking, and at Ayala station, nobody did! Haha they stayed away from blocking the conversation.
Then we rode a bus to Laguna where Ate Cheng lived and planned how to get to Nuvali by morning. We were still awake at 2 AM despite the fact that we needed to leave by 6 AM. Haha. Some people didn't even sleep. Breakfast and then we're off to meet Miki and his sister and cousins for a ride to Nuvali.
It got better eventually, despite the heat. There were water stations, and we had to make a decision half way: take the Horde Way or the Easy Way. Well what the hell, it's better to enjoy the thrill so we faced a greater number of zombies!! HORDE WAY.
 |
| With people from CCC dressed as shepherds. So COOL. |
In the end, after some tumbles, slips, exhaustion and sunburn, everyone finished with at least one life left!! We survived the outbreak and we have a t-shirt to prove it! (photos soon) SO MUCH FUN.
Then after eating lunch we drove back to Quezon City to a sports club Miki's family was a member of. We took a bath (luxurious air-conditioned bath, that is) and played bowling. At first I told them I don't want to play because I basically suck at bowling, but they already paid for me so I gave it a try. Turns out? I am betterrrrrr :) Pays to have friends who took up duck pin bowling. Haha.
We were supposed to play Rockband but I had to go home because (tears) they are moving our furniture. I also had to finish a project. It was really stressful because the movers arrived at almost midnight so that I can't sleep because they were dragging the things (yes, and I just came from Outbreak). It's a bit sad seeing our things being taken a part, and having to decide which things to keep and which ones to let go... But seeing the living room empty of the furniture made it a little easier. I'm still in denial of the fact that we're moving. I lock my doors and pretend to be infuriated of the noise, but I was actually preserving my sense of home (aww).
I also decided not to go to Hybrid because of all these things. I needed time to adjust and think and pray for my direction. But I'm pretty excited when God shows me the way. It may all be fragmented now, but he shall complete it for me.
Graduation.... in one week. :)
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Ocular
Meet Mark, who invites you to join Hope: Commonwealth this summer!
So I went to UP last Tuesday to make a ocular in their dug-out at Commonwealth. Mark and his wife Ruth have helped organize PBJ (Philippine Basketball for Jesus) which aims to form basketball teams with the urban youths. Galing diba? They share the Gospel after the games and encourage team members to share as well. I'm so excited for this!
Right now I back in Rizal and our things are a mess. Dad have just raked away most of my stuff, although there is still a lot of trash left. The problem is fitting it into our house. Imagine two houses combining things! Expect overcrowding and a lot of recycling!
Adjustment, adjustment. :) Forcing myself to think I have all the time in the world to live alone!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Home Life
I'm almost finished with my second assignment at work! I'm feeling really happy. Maybe, just maybe, I won't get fired. Haha (nega?) :))
 |
| My "work station"... actually, no. Haha. |
I like being "in the zone" ~ you know, being totally engrossed with what you're doing so that you barely have to think about whether it's worth it or it's good enough. As the Nike saying goes, you're "just doing it".
 |
| My grandma's pamana to me years and years ago. I lost pairs of gold earrings when I was younger so it was only now that she let me have this. |
Still, I missed going to my grandma's in Laguna because of the busyness and commute between Rizal and Cavite. We are cleaning up our things, and slowly our home in Rizal is turning into fragments. Only my room remains untouched, but only until Thursday. Hopefully the cabinet is assembled by then. Haha.
 |
| Hello daddy, who foresaw what her daughter will be doing once she turns 18. Haha! |
Few weeks to go before graduation day!
One day before the HOPE Commonwealth ocular
One week before Outbreak Manila
Less than a month for Hybrid :|
One day before the HOPE Commonwealth ocular
One week before Outbreak Manila
Less than a month for Hybrid :|
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Home, At Last
Okay, maybe not. I'm still in Rizal (and yes I've posted another blog within the same hour).
The house is empty. It's weird how a house is not a home without the family. I have gotten used to staying home alone and eating whatever crap is left in the house. In fact, I happened to enjoy having too many things to do that going home is deterred. But something is different.
I realized that no matter how I complain of the distance, the things lacking at home (Internet, a room to myself, cable TV, access to the most happening malls and my closes friends), still my family is important to me. Even though we fight, argue, hate each other and shout at each other sometimes, well oftentimes, the laughs and talks outweigh them all.
I love my family, and maybe just maybe, I would be able to find grace in my second chance at living with them. Anyway, it could only go for so long.
The house is empty. It's weird how a house is not a home without the family. I have gotten used to staying home alone and eating whatever crap is left in the house. In fact, I happened to enjoy having too many things to do that going home is deterred. But something is different.
I realized that no matter how I complain of the distance, the things lacking at home (Internet, a room to myself, cable TV, access to the most happening malls and my closes friends), still my family is important to me. Even though we fight, argue, hate each other and shout at each other sometimes, well oftentimes, the laughs and talks outweigh them all.
I love my family, and maybe just maybe, I would be able to find grace in my second chance at living with them. Anyway, it could only go for so long.
Oh, Shoot!
Last night I was contemplating on how I'm turning out to be a "bad" employee in my less than a week job at the company. Haha.
The guilt kept me up until 2 AM until I realized my laptop is hopeless and I should go to sleep because our "grandest ever" photoshoot requires me to be up by 6:30 AM.
Today, my legs are immobile and probably crawling with varicose as I stood for about 10 hours. Usually we personally model our products, but since we want as many people as possible involved, we collaborated with other online shops. And I must say, it was a HUGE success!
I can't tell you how it's difficult meeting with strangers to coordinate over a crucial and labor-intensive work such as a photoshoot. But I loved how everyone was both professional and fun! At first there was a demarcation, but everybody started to get involved with the picture-taking, make-up, hair styling, fashion styling and arranging the goods.
We shared make-up tips, hair tips and fashion tips. We witnessed how each other worked at their best talent and specialization (actually, all of us are just part-time in our vocation since we have a day job/not graduated yet. But you can feel the passion).
Most of all, we became friends. :)
At least there is one thing in which I know I got a "good job" at. <3 :)
The guilt kept me up until 2 AM until I realized my laptop is hopeless and I should go to sleep because our "grandest ever" photoshoot requires me to be up by 6:30 AM.
Today, my legs are immobile and probably crawling with varicose as I stood for about 10 hours. Usually we personally model our products, but since we want as many people as possible involved, we collaborated with other online shops. And I must say, it was a HUGE success!
I can't tell you how it's difficult meeting with strangers to coordinate over a crucial and labor-intensive work such as a photoshoot. But I loved how everyone was both professional and fun! At first there was a demarcation, but everybody started to get involved with the picture-taking, make-up, hair styling, fashion styling and arranging the goods.
 |
| Nadz (my co-stylist), Ida (MUA), models Chanty and Kat, CJ, me and our photographer Anabelle Not with us is Weng (clothes provider) and Anina (accessories provider) |
We shared make-up tips, hair tips and fashion tips. We witnessed how each other worked at their best talent and specialization (actually, all of us are just part-time in our vocation since we have a day job/not graduated yet. But you can feel the passion).
Most of all, we became friends. :)
 |
| I also got to be made up for free! Although it's not obvious, it's a far cry from my 4-hour sleep face |
At least there is one thing in which I know I got a "good job" at. <3 :)
Friday, April 6, 2012
The mess I'm in
Say hello to (the current state of) my room.
In another news the two job-related projects are heavy considering that the libraries are closed and right across the city from my home. I really need a new place. But for now the compartment will do. I would probably save up for a year and then get the hell out. I'm starting to fear I've been bothering people too much by complaining. And I hate that. :)
My family have just gone back to Rizal to gather up our things. Meanwhile, I'm behind closed doors getting down to business. *Pun intended* The clothes hanging on my drawer will be used for tomorrow's shoot, which is the first major one in our history! It sucks to have so many malls closed because we can't really shop for props and hair accessories.
I'm getting pretty sentimental with all this. This room. Back in Cavite my private space have been demoted to the under construction cabinet, which by the way, isn't mine alone. :( How can I possibly fit all my things in the cramped space... (complaining again, sorry, you have to understand that I'm pretty territorial).
 |
| From my dorm room |
In another news the two job-related projects are heavy considering that the libraries are closed and right across the city from my home. I really need a new place. But for now the compartment will do. I would probably save up for a year and then get the hell out. I'm starting to fear I've been bothering people too much by complaining. And I hate that. :)